The Celebration

(Written on the day of the funeral)
Dear Dad,

Last night, we had the "family visitation" at the funeral home.  So many people came.  It was amazing!

And you looked GREAT!  You were in your uniform, you looked like an older version of the dad I remember, like your picture in the foyer.

It was so good...Kennedy, my grand daughter, said the greatest thing - when we were standing by your coffin, teary eyed, she said, "Why are you sad?"

I looked at her and said, "What a great question!" Why are we sad?

This is not about mourning, but the celebration of your life, of your legacy, who you were, who you are, and the fact that we will see you again!

The sadness left and we enjoyed talking about you, sharing stories about you, and before we left, we gathered n a circle, held hands and gave thanks for your life.

I know this sounds crazy, but I could have sworn you were smiling.

Today, was the real job.  I was up visiting with friends and family until midnight, worked on the DVD until 2 am, then back up at 430 am to finish it.

Between the DVD and my own opportunity to talk, I was exhausted, but the military ceremony was incredible.

I have your hat, the flag draped over you, and one of the 3 cartridges given to the family.

It feels really good right now.

Everything you ever wanted happened.

You retired from the Army, graduated college, retired from a second career, enjoyed your family and friends, and now, you were buried in the National Cemetery with full Military Honors.

You are a rare man Dad, you achieved everything you set out to do.

Back in July 2009, you dictated a message to be delivered to the family upon your death.  I hope you don't mind that I had it printed in the leaflet we handed out.  Who better to receive the family message, but your "family" from the church, your community, your life?

By the way, it was good to see you again.

If you are okay with it, I think I am going to write you for a while longer, maybe help clear up some of those lost emotions that seem to run amok at times like this.

"If you are okay with it"...I am not foolish, just looking at this as it really is, you are gone, and I haven't let go yet.

I will.

It just may take a little time.

In the mean time, I will continue to express feelings in the form of a letter to you, and eventually, about you.

So, like I said on the DVD at the funeral...We will miss you, but we will see you again.